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Make it be the art of procrastination,
I have long since honored my parent in the academy of life, I have an undergraduates degree in procrastination, then I decided to do my honors in it and trust me if I carry on like this, I will most defiantly do a masters degree.
I remember when I graduated from undergrad studies, it was my matric year and the deadline to submit for registration to the national exam, was an hour left before cut off, and guess what I was doing? Updating my portfolio, dear me I was between a rock and a hard place but I managed to get out of that,,,

Now, well let’s say I am probably the end of myself, lol the only thing I say to justify this silly tactic, is that I was too busy doing something rather very important, mind you it was not too important for me to rick my studies but hay, im planning to get a masters in this life style,

What major thing can happen out of this little stint or Big stint some may say? And the best thing that also justifies this problem is that I always say “ I work well under pressure, this is how I thrive”

That’s the craziest line I use, but it works wonders, what I am trying to say is that I need a method to stop this line of living coz it will catch up with me,

Or maybe it has?????
hmmmm

tell me what you think??

It is said that failing is a part of learning, well i beg to differ at this point.
You see we grow up being told that “if at first you don't succeed, pick yourself up and try again”
you also do so the second time around. It bull krack to do something over and over only to fail over and over, it is not that you threw in the towel when you decide you have had it with trying out the same thing more then once, it is just that you have come to relies how the repetitive act that end with FAIL! Is draining all the life out of you while you try to sink (oops i meant to say SWIM) while hopelessly sinking.

Just an idea “is it wrong to try something once, then if it fails ridiculously, you bid it good-bye and you move on?

does the term “once bitten, twice shy” no longer apply?
And why the Gideons do people say that your a “giver-upper” if you choose to chuck a time consuming activity?

Is “Giver-upper” even a word?

“Jack of all Trades, Master on none”

A general opinion- have we all heard the term “jack of all trades, master of none”? , well that has slowly become something I am far too familiar with.
To console myself I normally say it’s because I am a woman and genetically poses the ability to multitask and manage it all, well honey this has got nothing to do with multitasking and being a woman.

It’s that ever confusing push-factor some of us have and that warped sense of fulfillment in doing more then one thing at the same time. Yes I say it again, in my opinion it’s that need to fill a void that allows me the misfortune of trying to work on every project, job assignments or any other “thing” that misleads me mentally into thinking and believing that it is for the greater good, and “hay I am building a C.V.”

These lines of thinking, dear reader are not medically advised and trust me when I say it will leave you with more medical bills then an ordinary patient. Let me name the first one (Therapy) with so much on your plate your bound to end up in a shabby well furnished office room, sitting or in some cases laying on a modern sofa across some prude with a degree in psychology. Behind those eyes they manage to make you feel pathetic, borderline crazy, and nit forgetting to mention they hypnotize you into believing that you need to pay them to tell you what you already know.

Skipping this psychobabble and mumbo-jumbo, here is the problem, in your search to be successful you tryout each and everything your asked to do, you cant say no, and in the process you neglect the important things in you life, you break promises to the closest people, you end up feeling suffocated and under pressure, “mind you my dear, this is all your doing” you and that damn C.V.
This line of living becomes a never ending spiral and when you get very dizzy from the constant round about, the next time you wake up you’ll be in a sterile smelling white room and that ever so waiting call from the doctor, then at that point you will know “Die pope, Sal dance”, With one thing ringing true in your mind,

“Is it all worth it?”

PAIN, LET ME BE.

Pain let me be,
i live with you on a daily basis,
I eat, sleep, breath, you

pain stay away from me
do you not get tired of the same face?
why do you taunt me so ?

pain what is it about me that makes you stay?
pain do you not have anything better to do?
am I your easy target ?
do I attract you?
do I intrigue you?
do I set your fire alight?

pain why do you use me so,
Pain i can no longer live without you.
pain is it so that you will rape me from all emotion?
pain do you hate me so much , that you torture me with
that sweet cares
pain do you hate me so much ,that you torture me with
what you call love

pain is it love when you hurt my feeling ?
pain do you find it attractive when i cry?
pain do you find it sexy when i suffer ?

you have taken everything,i have nothing
you have molested me to the core,
you have become part of me

so
pain let me be
please let me be
please i beg you you let me be.

by Tanki..

As the hours loom closer to my birthday, I am slowly feeling a bit out of it all, you see the thing is aside from being a year closer to "50" I also see a lot of people flooding the pharmacy in search of "for-ever-young" products that are sure to make you "look" and feel years younger than what you are. What is this search of youth that we all seek as soon as we turn 21?. Can we not age with grace and self-worth? Then I realise I too am not any different, because at this moment I feel like age is closing in on me only because I end up with questions like will I achieve all that I want to achieve by the time I reach 50? what will the poverty statistics be like by the time I reach 50 and what did I contribute in improving those stats'?

Its just food for the mind realy, but I am sure by Monday I will have some direction.

from me again, i will just say "you are as young as you feel" and today I feel old

CRIES OF PAIN

Mother ,oh Mother .
Mother of earth, why have you forsaken me?
I feel alone,i feel cold,oh so cold

it is i, YESS it is i
the child of man,child of land
child of silent pain ,child of history
yes i feel alone,
for the world is too dark,but noisy

Sounds of bombs,oh so loud
sounds of guns .oh so sharp
Sounds of sorrow,oh so loud
Sounds of cries from a child in Africa, Rwanda, Darfur, Iraq.

Oh so loud these sounds are,cutting through my heart with a blunt knife.
Pain so strong i cry in silence, for i too am in pain but out there the pain is stronger
louder,till mine seems so small,oh so small, i cry

Mother ,oh Mother
i yearn for comfort,love and warmth
Mother ,oh mother
i yearn for PEACE, UNITY & UBUNTU

BY tANKI

today I was asked the question above.
And it's really confusing me at the moment as I feel that I have not lost my direction but feel that I am in search of the lane I need to take to be a better person.

"The road less traveled is a road with wonder"